One of the things I hate the most in life, is having to say goodbye. Having to say goodbye when you go away for holidays, saying goodbye to family after you visit them, having to say goodbye to the ones you love most. Thats something I have never had to do before. Never moved, always been in Singapore and UWC. As most of you know, I have been going to UWC since I was 4 years old, K1. I'm now 13, and in G7. I've had to say goodbye to people when they leave and I've watched people come and go from the school. But I have never been the one that has actually left everything they have ever know. UWC is the only school I have ever been to and I've lived in Singapore since I was 1 year of age. My home is here. And now being told that I am moving homes to a place where there is no uniforms, 4 seasons, only 2 or 3 classes in a grade and where everything is in Japanese, is a feeling I can't even put into words.
Getting the news that I am moving to Japan, was one of the hardest things I have ever had to hear. Sure it in a way is exiting news, but i'm being told to leave everything I've ever know to go to a new place, a new school, and a new life. It's just something I have never had to do before. I don't want to have to leave my friends behind or my life. I love it here and it will take a long time to get used to the change. To be honest, it has been hard for me. I cried a couple of time because I just didn't know what else to do. I was upset and scared. But now I think it's just because i'm scared of adventuring in a new environment. I am scared of going to somewhere completely new and somewhere where I know nothing about. I know I will like Yokohama International School, but I will always love UWCSEA more. It is my home and the place I grew up, and where my education and knowledge has grown and developed. I love it here and I'm not ready to go yet. I always envisioned that I would stay at UWC until I was in G12, but that, however, is not the case at all.
I love my life here and I'm happy. But now I have to try and find that same happiness again in a new school. I guess this post so far seems like a negative boo hoo type of post, but i'm speaking from my heart. But to be honest, I am slightly exited for it. It is a new place, new country, new people. I know I will enjoy it there no matter how much I miss life at UWC. I have decided that saying, acting, and just having a lightly better view of it helps in a way. The post is a step towards feeling better and getting over the fact that I am not staying here at UWC forever. There is soo much more I still want to say but I can't. Not yet anyways.
Since this blog is registered with my school account, after I go I will no longer have access to it. So I will almost defiantly make a new blog and continue posting on that one.
I love my friends at UWC and I'm gonna miss you guys like crazy! I'm going to treasure all the moments and says I have left with you guys! There is only 4 months left before the end of the school year!
Sammie <3
omg sam ;c please don't go. I seriously can't believe grade 7 is going by so fas! All those sibu memories,class jokes,our inside jokes..are just going to be the last chapter. We're all gonna miss you so much! But I'm telling you, JAPAN IS GONNA BE AWESOME! New friends! New teachers! New house! You get to re-design your own bedroom AGAIN! AT LEAST YOU GET TO SEE SNOW! (winter). I'm so jelly~ would be dying to be in your spot right now!
ReplyDeleteGonna miss you so much ;c dont forget me and our little memories. love you sam! -nat c;
Awww I'm gonna miss you soo much Nat and all the memories from this year! Of corse I won't forget you! How could I?!
DeleteI love you to Nat!
Sammie <3
WOW!! I started crying when I finished reading your post, I know how it feels to move, specially when you get attached to the place, and Singapore being the place where you have lived your whole life! I totally understand how you feel and the first move is always the hardest, specially when you get a bit older. It is really hard to settle in, make friends, etc. but its just one of the big challenges life gives you. But I think you will settle in just fine!
ReplyDeleteThank you soo much Vartika! Ya it will be a challenge, but time and being open-minded is the key!
DeleteSammie <3
Omg I'm going to miss you so much Sam. You are such an amazing friend. At least they have seasons in Japan, you can see snow. You still have four months though!!!!DO NOT FOGET ME!!!!
ReplyDeleteThank you Sav! I'm gonna miss you to! Of corse I won't forget you!
DeleteSammie <3
Wow everyone's comments are so emotional all I want to say is sam dont worry you will always have the friends you made here just not directly. For example there is skype and so on so relax. I think you're gonna love Japan, as I have seen in your previous posts you like japanese arcades so that'll be great and here one more thing you could do make these 4 months the best 4 months or you life, make them so amazing that you will never forget them.
ReplyDeleteGood Luck and Faboo Post
Sid Pid The Science Kid
P.S We will miss you !!!
Haha! Thank you soo much for the comment Sid!
DeleteGonna miss you too!
Sammie <3
You know, sometimes I feel like it is harder being the one watching someone leave than the one who is actually leaving... get what I mean? Gurrl, I've known you for like 5 years now, ever since Grade 3. I'm never gonna forget the times we had as the cute chubby 8-9 years olds, we all used to be. You have inserted yourself into my memory- DON'T WORRY! There is no way we are gonna forget you or let you go- we will just have to kidnap you! (I meant it in a metaphorical kind of way) The point is, when we come to the moment when we gonna see you walk away from us, and us having to just give you a wave and then turn away... we all gon cry aren't we? It's as if you are keeping on going with time, but we will be left in the moment- that moment when we gonna let u gooooo. :( Is this making you feel better? I'm sorry... :(
ReplyDeleteLet's just remember that we will still be here for each other. You'll be in my <3 and I'll be in your <3- no matter whether you want me to be!!!
Love Freya
Freya, this is really sweet! I remember those times back in G3, and G4 at Sibu! THE CENTIPEDE IN OUR CABIN! How we have changes over the years. I'm dreading the moment when I have to say goodbye, but as you said, you will always be in my <3. Thank you for everything!
DeleteLot's of Love, Sammie <3
OMG THE CENTIPEDE!!!! lollololoolloll and that small bug that you guys were too afraid to kill so I had to!!! I'LL NEVER FORGET YOU!
DeleteHAAHAHAH! YA! Defiantly! I'll never forget you either!
DeleteSam.. You have to be happy and smile ok, when you're leaving, when I'm waving.. Ok? Smile :)
ReplyDeleteBut hey, it's 4 months from now!
You really poured ou your feelings here and impacted everyone who read this.. Like literally.
People change, but memories don't, hold on to all of them ok? Please.
I know I haven't written much and you might be going like "I Expected more from you" bla bla,
but I have to explain everything else in person not through a space age device called the 'internet'
I'm gonna miss you when your gone :c x
Thank you so much Aayushi! No promises about being smily and happy on the last day of school, but I'll try. I won't ever forget all the memories that we created. I will hold onto them forever and more.
DeleteI'm gonna miss you soo much! :C
Sammie <3
Sam I know that its hard to leave back memories and leaving back your pals and friends but I know you are going to have a good time not only in UWC but in Japan too. I am fairly new here but I know that you are able to be strong. We all are not going to forget you. You are one of a kind::))))))
ReplyDeleteGood Luck Sam
We will miss you!!!
Arman
Thank you so much Arman :) I could never forget you guys! I'll miss you to!
DeleteSammie <3
Hey Sam, It's Connor. I know how you feel as I have been through many times before. In a way my lifestyle has almost been the opposite to mine. Getting into a new school is nerve racking the first few days and you feel like you're going to hate it but trust me it will get better. Knowing you you'll make friends in no time. As you may or may not know I'm also moving at the end of this year. Of course the move won't be as hard as England is considered home for me but I have had other experiences. I know Japanese is a whole different language to you but think of all the other people in our school that don't have english as their first language.
ReplyDeleteP.S. Also because you're going to an international school, I'm sure they'll speak English.
Hope you have a great time in Japan. :)
Thank you Connor. Ya they do all speak english at the school. You'l love living in England, as you said it was your home. I hope the best for you in your new school and that you'll like it there.
DeleteSammie <3
Dearest Sam,
ReplyDeleteWas looking through the blogs today and can't believe I missed this one. Anyway, I totally agree with you. Goodbyes are hard and annoying and painful but also precious and inevitable and a part of life. I love it that you've found this space to be able to talk about it. And so self aware...about what it is that's scary about moving. YIS will be great. You will find a new space and home there. And that doesn't mean you will have to let go of your memories and gratitude for having grown up in such an awesome place like UWC and Singapore. That will always have a spot in your heart, right?
And you know what? Go ahead and feel. Feel whatever it is that you need to feel in order to deal with leaving and saying goodbye because you know what? The pain is the same. So might as well feel it. Express it. Then grow from it.
You are a beautiful person and you will be missed. But you are also strong and honest. I know it's months away and there's time. So make the most of it. Don't take a moment for granted. Take it all in and cry. Then when you set foot on that plane to your new life, you will have no regrets.
Ah, to be loved. There are no goodbyes, really. Just see you later.
Love,
Ms. P
Thank you so much Ms. Paula! As I was reading through this I started crying. i started crying becuase everything you said was true. I will always have my memories and uwc holds a place in my heart and it will stay there. Uwc and all my friends have their own space, their own room in my heart, very close to the centre. Crying helps because you, well I'm just letting all my feelings out and afterwards I feel slightly better. But I will always secretly be thinking about uwc and everyone here. I will never truly be able to get over leaving my amazing home and friends here in Singapore, UWC. Everyone here means so much to me and are very special and important to me. All my friends have always been there for me but in Japan they won't be there for me (maybe vertuly but there is time difference). I am a very loud, weird, bouncy girl who is not afraid to share her thoughts. I just hope my personality is not TOO loud for the kids in my G8 class there :) Nah. I think I might fit in. Maybe people will think I'm amazingly weird in a good way :D Thank you for everything you have done for me Ms. Paula. You are such an amazing person and a true inspiration. I am going to miss you soo much and I wished I could have you as my English teacher again next year! Thank you for everything!
DeleteLove Sammie <3